Hi E2,
Madness now has a new name! It's time for some logically logic twisting stories!
What you are about to read totally lack sense and even basic thinking, if you so happen to have lamnophobia (Fear of Lameness *Not your leg*) Please reframe from reading further by closing your eyes.
Thank you.
Base on a true recount....
Alright! I'm sure all of you remembered the Food Cross challenge we had on Friday. Well... One of the rules of the game was that we are require to take a picture with the food vendors as a prove that we brought the food from them. However, we encountered several cases where these vendors refuse to take a picture with us. Hence I came up with two conclusion of who they are and where they come from. Thus I gave my deduction, evidences and conclusion as the Zombie Theory.
1. They are undead.
Technically, undead are actually dead people but somehow manage to retain memories and abilities to move their body. They are suppose to be dead, which means they don't exist. Thus they do not have a reflection in front of a mirror nor could their images be captured in a digital camera.
2. They are Zombies!
Based on the food vendors we encountered, most of them sell sweet food item or food not associated with salt. To support my conclusion, here is my evidence. Zombies are actually decay flesh, and salt is a good preservative where people use in the past to preserve their food. Salt helps the food to dry thus preserving them. Hence when decayed flesh comes in contact with salt, they dries up too; and with more salt applied to them. They will be so dried up that even against a gentle breeze, they will crumble and be reduced to ashes.
Scenario 1
Coffeeshop Auntie: Here kid, here's your coffee.
Zombie Slayer: Ok, thanks auntie. Here's the money with abit of salt.
Coffeeshop Auntie: AHHH!!!!! NO!!!! MY HAND!!!!! ARGH!!!!!>>> O_0 >>> X_X
*Coffeeshop Auntie Vanquish*
Coffeeshop Uncle: MY WIFE!!!! You little imp....!!!! I shall.....!!!!
Zombie Slayer: Here you go uncle! Have some salt too!
Coffeeshop Uncle: AHHHH!!!!! MY FACE!!!!!! ARRGGGHHH!!! ORGH!!!! >>> 0_O >>> X_X
Desert Store Uncle: The Zombie Slayer is here!!!! Run for your unlife!!!! *Like LOL unlife?*
Zombie Slayer: Heheheheh.... There is no escape for all of you, I place salt into the water tank of your emergency fire spinkler.
*Take out lighter*
*Burn a piece of paper*
*Wave it over the spinkler*
All Zombie Vendor: AHHH!!!! We are melting AGAHAHERHEHEREHRSDEHRedkhneirh!!!!!!!!!!
*Oh well... You can't really speak clearly when you are in the process of melting*
*Plate Washing Uncle survived, because he was in the toilet filling up his washing buckets*
Plate Washing Uncle: Where the heck everybody go? GOOD!!! Lesser plates to wash!
Zombie Slayer: Uncle, I go something important to tell you.
Plate Washing Uncle: What is it you want?! Go away! I'm busy!
Zombie Slayer: But it's really important. Please heard me out.
Plate Washing Uncle: Alright! Alright!!! What is it you want kid??!!!!!
Zombie Slayer: Hehehehe *With a smirk on the face* I put salt into your dish washing bucket!!
*Plate Washing Uncle look at his hand*
Plate Washing Uncle: ahh... Ahhh... AHHHH..... AGRHHHH..... MY HAN@##$%#@#$#%$....
*Like LoL for scenario 1*
*Anthony asked me what if the zombies are too powerful?*
*Well... Lets look at scenario 2*
Coffeeshop Auntie: Here kid, here's your coffee.
Zombie Slayer: Ok, thanks auntie. Here's the money and a popsticle(A Stalactite) .
[Wiki: Stalactite = Stalactites are formed by the deposition of calcium carbonate and other minerals, which is precipitated from mineralized water solutions. The corresponding formation on the floor underneath a stalactite is known as a stalagmite. Given enough time, these formations can meet and fuse to create columns.]
[Technically Stalactite is like a mineral salt, and salt is still salt. So it still works as salt]
Coffeeshop Auntie: AHHH!!!!! NO!!!! MY HAND!!!!! ARGH!!!!!>>> O_0 >>> X_X
*Coffeeshop Auntie Vanquish*
Coffeeshop Uncle: MY WIFE!!!! You little imp....!!!! I shall.....!!!!
Zombie Slayer: Here you go uncle! Have some popsticle too!
*Throwing one into his mouth*
Coffeeshop Uncle: Gulp.... My stomach it's burning!!! ARHHHHGHGHH!@#$%^&*%^& >>> 0_O >>> X_X
*Like LOL*
The End =)
